“Are You Your Best Mate?”
Yes, I will wait while you grab a pen, paper, open up a document in Word….
1. Make a List: So, whether you a married, dating, or single make a list of your “ideal” mate.
2. Be Specific: on what you want.
Examples: “loves Thai food, likes roller coasters, has a funny laugh that makes everyone laugh, can cook vegan dishes, compassionate, has a way of making me smile when I have a bad day etc.” Order up, the menu of life is willing to serve you whatever you desire! You can’t just say pasta and expect Fettuccine Alfredo with Broccoli, sauce on the side. You MUST be specific.
3. Feel the List: this doesn’t require hand to paper, let me explain. Look at each word on your list, now FEEL yourself riding the roller coaster, exhilarating I am sure. FEEL yourself sitting across from your mate eating Thai, what does it FEEL like, connect yourself with the feeling of each word on your list as if you have gotten it already.
4. Circle YOU on your list: Now go down your list and circle all the “ideals” that you are. Congrats you are quite the catch!
5. Take note: of those that aren’t you. Put a check beside the ones that really aren’t you, like “funny”, “sporty”, “creative cook”, etc.
6. Get to work: on the areas that you want in a mate that aren’t you. If you are in a marriage or relationship engage your partner in finding fun and creative ways for you to be and attract your ideal.
Example: Tell your partner, “we are going to play Iron Chef. Go to the store and buy an interesting ingredient.” When your mate comes back pull out the cookbooks, search the web, and together make a new and creative meal.
Perhaps you are single and don’t identify yourself as very compassionate but want that in a mate. Grab a friend and find a charity or local event to get involved in. There are limitless possibilities so find something that fits you.
*If you feel like you need additional support in your relationship whether it be with communication, increasing intimacy, finding the ideal mate, etc please give us a call, where are here to support you in achieving what matters to you most contact us.
Our next post on relationships will be “How to Shift the Anatomy of an Argument”
By Katie Lemieux