12 Tips for Couples to Stay Connected During the Holidays

The holidays can be fun and exciting but totally laden with busyness and stress. There’s the shopping, kids’ recitals, decorating, mentally preparing to spend time with relatives who you may have spent all year avoiding, and just day to day life. At times resources such as time, money and energy can be stretched thin and often we forget our partner with all the stresses during the holiday season. This is all the more reason to put each other first.  Here are some simple things you can do to stay connected during the holiday season.


Let’s tickle and play with your 5 senses, including the 6th sense for fun:

1. Sight – create a fire in the fireplace if you have one, turn on the holiday lights and turn everything else off including all electronics and the chatter in your mind.   Sit face to face and look each other in the eyes and send each other positive thoughts, a wish or something you are grateful for when it comes to each other. Tap into your 6th sense and see if you can guess what thought your partner sent you and share it aloud.

2. Smell- the holidays are full of smells that we don’t get to smell throughout the year.  Entice your partner with a scent he or she likes. Bake something, put on a fragrant lotion or cologne.

3. Taste – share a special holiday treat together. Pick a treat that reminds you of a fond holiday memory, perhaps it is a childhood memory or a memory of your first holiday together. Discuss the memory while you indulge in this treat.  Engage all your senses, smell it with your eyes closed while you feed one another, chew it in slow motion, tasting all the flavors.  You can also create new memories.  I love pinterest for great food ideas.

4. Touch – cozy up, partner 1 closes his/her eyes and touches partner 2 gently. Communicate through your heart, using touch rather than words. Ask your partner what he/she felt.  Don’t forget to switch.

5. Sound – Get silent, sit hand in hand and listen to what you hear.  As an ex-northern (the cold was way too much for me) one of the ONLY things I loved about the snow besides the beauty of snowfall was the silence it created. It was this interesting type of silence I can’t describe.  I loved to sit in front of our big window at night with all the lights off just watching and listening to the snow and the silence it created.  So much arises from silence.

Have some fun:

6. If you live in a cold weather climate and have snow, make snow angels then post the pic to facebook or your favorite social media. A good snowball fight creates fun, don’t forget to infiltrate “enemy lines” and tackle your partner, then have a good make out session.

7. Take a peek at your bucket list.  Is NYC during the holiday season on there?  Take it to Rockefeller Center in NYC and go ice skating, skate hand in hand drink some hot chocolate to warm up afterwards then head over to Radio City Music Hall to see the Rockettes or another great holiday play or classic.

8. Create an advent calendar of love – advent calendars come from the Catholic religion.  They are a calendar countdown to Christmas starting with December 1st.  Create a calendar for your partner with something for each day, whether it is a task, saying, or small fun gift.

9. There is always time for romance- leave a note for your partner in the car, in his/her lunch bag, or by the keys.

10. The holiday gift clue countdown – since my spouse loves facebook I used it as a vehicle to drop daily hints to the big present. It was so much fun for both of us and our friends and family got to get in on the fun.

If you there is distance between you….

11. Make time to talk. Honor that time and be sure to give each other undivided attention. Try something fun- describe a romantic fantasy or your first encounter together.  Create a new tradition on how to spend holidays “together” over the miles.

12. Use the postal service! Send fun, sweet, and loving letters or gifts.

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